Thursday, September 5, 2013

Issy Stapleton's Justice

Kelli Stapleton attempted murder-suicide, the attempted murder victim being her autistic daughter, Issy. People are giving their sympathy to Kelli because "autistic children are so hard to deal with" and things like that. Because Issy is autistic, we are told not to judge. But. Neurodivergent K knows something important: "Judging those who kill offspring should be our most basic instinct." That applies to people who try and fail, by the way. Autistic people tend to remind folks of that. This time, it's just a bit more formally organized- we're having a flash blog. [No, you don't have to be Autistic to participate, you just need to get that killing your disabled kid is not excusable ever.]

There's two sections.

The first is writing what we would like to tell Issy. Neurodivergent K's post is a really good example of this- tell her the way she is is OK, that it's not her fault her mother tried to murder her, that she shouldn't listen to how the newspapers are portraying her. Tell her she has value as a person.
The second is the outrage. If you love your kid, you don't try to kill your kid. If you try to justify people killing their kids, if you try to put it on a lack of services, if you put it on "but it's so haaaaaard," why the hell are you giving sympathy to murderers? Tell people that shit isn't OK. Paula and Beth both have good examples of this. Talking about why murdering your disabled kid should be considered a hate crime does fit here, in case you were wondering. Because most of the things people say to give sympathy to the would-be murderers make good examples of why it should be considered a hate crime.

Outrage of lack of services is a thing, but this is not the place for it. Because when you put the lack of services conversation together with the don't kill your kids conversation, people start using the lack of services as justification and holding our lives hostage for our supports? Not OK. At all. 

Now for logistics:
What we need is either the text of your post if you don't have a blog of your own or a link to your post if you do and which section you think it goes in. You can be reprinted here if you want, but we don't do that unless you ask. Text can be sent to or messaged to Yes, That Too on Facebook. Links can be in comments here or on the post roll.
Comment moderation is on, so that's probably why you don't see your comments yet.

Yes, you can send stuff that was written before this went up.
Yes, one post can fit in both sections, and we can list it in both.
Yes, you can write multiple posts.


  1. I have a post. I don't know what a post-roll is so I didn't post the link there. If you want to reprint it on this blog, you can, but it is a bit messy/less organized than the other ones I have seen, though. Because anger is messy. Because I am angry. And I can't do paragraphs while angry, usually.

  2. Dear Issy.

    There are many many autistics in the world. But every one of us is unique and NOT REPLACEABLE though nothing and no one same as non-autistics are. I think you know that, but it helped ME through when my own parents let me down, so I hope it might help YOU to hear or read that.
    There's not much more I dare to say right know, because what happened to you is an incredible crime.
    I wish all the strength of the world for you to overcome this.
    Please don't stop to believe in people. Some of them hold good things within and sometimes share it with us.
    Get well soon...
    from the baltic sea.

    (You can officially post this.)